The Case of the Stinky Nose

March 6, 2012 at 1:31 pm (Entertainment)

Every couple has “their story”.
A story about when they first met, a not-so-funny at the time story about their wedding day that they now laugh at as they reminisce or an inside joke that only the two of them share.
Well, today I have decided to let you guys in on one such story. It is a story about love, passion and a stinky nose.
Picture it: April, 2009. My computer had been acting up, not connecting to the internet and generally being a pain in the patootie.
After having a successful sinus surgery that left me with severe post-anesthesia nausea and two black eyes, I decided to go in on one of my sick leave days to have my computer fixed.
Enter: The Geek Squad. Now, I had never had much interaction with this crowd. Men (and women…but mostly men) dressed in black slacks, white button down shirts, and signature black ties. Not exactly the uniform you picture when a southern belle exclaims, “I love men in uniform!”
I arrived at Best Buy, and mosied on over to the Geek Squad line. I grabbed a Sports Illustrated magazine (because if you read Sports Illustrated, men WILL be impressed). I waited, and waited and finally was called up. A nice Geek Squader, named Gabe, helped me with my tired computer. While he was futzing with my Vaio, I heard this loud noise (also known as hardcore music) and asked another guy behind the counter what he was listening to. Thus began the first conversation between Joseph and me. 

Since the surgery, fluids and dried blood had been slowly seeping into the cavity of my nose. Of course, this is part of the healing process but after two weeks it gets kind of smelly. I was using a saline nose wash to no avail. The stinky nose was there to stay until I went to the doctor.

So fast forward two weeks. Joseph and I had started courting or dating or whatever you young people call it now-days. It was a hot, humid, sultry (for effect) night and we were walking on Columbia’s riverwalk. For those of you who live in Columbia, you know the exact kind of night I am talking about. For whatever reason, everything was in place to make my nose smell as bad as it ever had. Joseph was wanting to hug me and stand close, as most couples do when they first start dating but I kept pushing him away in fear he would smell the odor wafting from my nose.

While walking, Joseph exclaimed, “Do you smell a skunk?”

I died. What? A skunk? “Uh…uh…no…um…I’ve never smelled a skunk before.” What a lame answer. Secretly I was thinking, “Just kill me now. I am not telling you about my stinky nose but I guess it’s good you think it’s a skunk and not me…then again you are calling me a skunk.”

Not too long after the case of the stinky nose.

I didn’t tell Joseph about my skunked up nose that night, or the next, or the month after. It wasn’t until we were engaged that I let him in on my little stinky nose secret. After visiting the doctor for the next two months, I finally healed and the stinky nose was no more.

And there you have it. The case of the stinky nose.

Do you have an “embarrasing-at-the-time” story?

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Run for God

February 28, 2012 at 7:54 pm (Entertainment)

For the past few months, I have been complaining non-stop to anyone who would listen that, “I am getting fat”, “I can’t fit into my jeans” and the ever present, “Marriage will make you fat!”

Well my friends, at the encouragement of a dear friend, I have joined the “Run for God” group at Riverland Hills Baptist Church. The program is designed after the “Couch to 5k” running regime. The first week you start out by jogging for 60 seconds followed by walking for 90 seconds, alternating for a 20 minute period. We meet in the church parking lot every Tuesday and Saturday to train for a 5k (some will be running a 10k) in May (http://www.getinthepink.org/). We then are required to run once more for a total of three training sessions per week. There is also a Bible study held on Sundays.

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So, last Sunday, I was driving to the first Bible study/sign up session. Saying I was nervous and doubtful was an understatement. Thoughts of “I can’t do this”, “I will fail”, “what if I am the biggest, slowest person there?” flooded my mind. Self doubt has always plagued my life.

When I arrived, donning new New Balance running shoes with bright green trim, I was greeted by smiling faces. All ages, sizes and genders were present. It was encouraging to see an older grandfather sitting a few sections over, a mother in her mid fifties sitting with her much younger daughter. The session started and we were asked to stand up and introduce ourselves by giving our name and a fun fact. Most people would say their name and explain why they joined the group. There were comments like, “I want to lose weight”, “my daughter is making me do this” and for many, this was their second go round with Run for God. They got so much out of it, they wanted to do it again. So, my turn came around. I stood up and said, “Hi, my name is Jessica Ackerman. I used to run for punishment when I used to play softball and would miss a pop-fly. I am hoping to get a renewed sense of running.” People chuckled, nodding their heads like they knew exactly what I was talking about.

I went home that night, encouraged by all of the positive comments and success stories. Tuesday came and I rushed from a counseling appointment after work to the very first running session. It was chilly. I was out of my element. I was downright awkward in the bright green New Balances. I thought, “who am I kidding? I am NOT a runner…I don’t run unless it’s away from my husband when he is trying to tickle me.”

After a brief prayer, the 5k group split from the 10k group. I wanted to beg my friend Brooke to change her mind, to run the 5k program with me. But I bucked up and walked over to the 5 k group where we started our 5 minute walk warm up. I heard a countdown 10-9-8…3-2-1, then a whistle. People around me started jogging, I found myself keeping with their pace. I focused on the person in front of me, breathing in 1-2-3. Breathing out: 1-2-3. Repeating. Focused. Soon the countdown again 10-9-8…3-2-1. Whistle. Walking. 90 seconds later: 10-9-8…3-2-1. Whistle. Running. 60 seconds later….

During some of the walking portions, I would chat with another runner. Asking for tips about breathing and stride.

After 20 minutes of the jog, walk, jog, walk…it was over. I felt amazing. Energized. I left with a smile and went right over to purchase running shorts and an athletic top. I was tempted to stop and get a frosty for a reward but figured the shorts and top were good enough. Plus…if you get a frosty, you have to get fries to dip in the frosty and that is just sad.

Saturday morning was FREEZING cold. I wanted to wear my new shorts and I did. I won’t make that mistake again.

So, here I am on week two. Everytime I see someone run I think, “That could be me. That will be me.”

Here is to running and not giving up.

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The saddest story ever told…

July 27, 2011 at 8:11 pm (Entertainment)

There is a poll conducted by Fox News that asked the question: Which film makes you cry the most?

Scientists at the Smithsonian found that the 1979 flick, “The Champ” was the winner.

Since I have never seen the tearjerker, I cannot comment on how valid the answer is but I can list my top 5 tearjerker movies (in no particular order):

1. Titanic – End Scene

I will admit, the first time I saw this movie in the theatre, I was crying the moment the music started at the beginning of the movie. Prior to the movie, (in my 7th grade glory), I had conducted research on the Titanic, the people aboard and its history. I was connected. I felt as if I was a part of this movie. The scene I was to highlight is the end scene; you see old Rose lying on a bed, the camera pans to a line of photographs of young rose doing all of the things that Jack and Rose talked about doing. Then camera then goes through the sunken Titanic, then you are back on the intact ship. You end up at the grande staircase where Jack and Rose are reunited for eternity. Give me a tissue, please.

2. Bambi – Death of Bambi’s Mom

Don’t even try to tell me that you didn’t cry whenever Bambi’s mother was shot. You know you did.

3. Moulin Rouge – Death of Satine

It never fails, every time I watch this movie…which…I don’t even know how many times I’ve seen this movie…I cry. I bawl. I use a whole box of tissues. “The greatest thing you’ll ever learn, is just to love, and be loved in return.”

4. Steel Magnolias – M’Lynn’s monologue on Shelby’s Death

This scene is both heartwrenching and funny. “Take a whack at Ouiser!”

5. What Dreams May Come – the whole movie

I bawled throughout this movie. There is so much sadness…and so much beauty.

Some other movies that deserve to be on the list:

Up, Million Dollar Baby, The Notebook, The Lion King, Passion of the Christ….and there are so many more.

What makes your list?

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Oh, Sleeper

December 15, 2010 at 6:15 pm (Entertainment)

Oh, mama…

Yesterday started out as a normal Tuesday. Joseph was off of work, running an errand for his grandma and buying my Christmas gift (yay!). I was at work, pushing papers and answering phone calls. During my break, I decided to start looking at options for Joseph’s Christmas gift.

The thing about buying gifts for Joseph is that it should be very easy. He has many hobbies (beer, drums, reading, music, guns…the list goes on) but that very statement makes it so hard to buy for him because there is so much that I could buy for him.

While looking online, I looked up Wuhan 16″ China Cymbals for his drum kit, ammo for his gun, “The Overton Window” by Glenn Beck….the list goes on. Then I got the bright idea to look up his favorite bands.

You see, when it comes to music our tastes are completely different. While I enjoy some older music (James Taylor and Michael Bolton…don’t judge me) as well as country music, Joseph enjoys a completely different genre: metalcore which I lovingly call “rawr, rawr, rawr” music.

So while browsing on Oh, Sleeper’s Web site, I saw that they were playing in Columbia! When you ask? That evening! How perfect! I was instantly giddy that I would be able to give Joseph something that I know he would love even though my ears may not enjoy it. I mean, the boy took me to an Edwin McCain show and didn’t laugh at me when I was starstruck by the saxophonist, Craig Shields.  (I got his autograph…swoon!)

The experience was one that I will never forget, you see, I used to listen to “rawr, rawr, rawr” music when I was in high school and haven’t been to a show since. Last night’s show brought back so many memories, the nostalgia was incredibly thick. Being able to share in the experience with Joseph was so sweet and the joy that radiated from him last night gave me joy in return.

We were able to talk to some of the band members after the show and let me tell you…they are genuine. I told the lead singer that I was NOT a fan of their music but seeing them play has completely changed my mind. He was so gracious and laughed. The guitarist sat next to us at the bar and commented on Joseph’s trench coat (aka The Cow). I told him not to encourage Joseph…I dislike The Cow. They are unphased by the thousands of people who follow their music, they are grateful for the fans but know that they are human and their God is the one who is great.

And the music? WOW! It was fast paced, get-on-your-feet-and-run-into-someone type music. The best of all? They gave credit where credit is due: to God.

Their lyrics are worshipful and powerful:

“From the armories the angels sing. You will see them end this suffering.
From the armories the angels sing. You will fear them when they lift their wings.
They will sing to a world reborn.
They will sing as I cut off your horns.
I’ll cut off your horns”

From – The Finisher

Oh yes. That is Jesus telling the devil that He is going to cut off his horns. That is my Jesus 🙂

I find their symbol or logo very intriguing. It is a mutilated pentagram.

Source

To explain the pentagram in relation to a goat, I will turn my blog over to Wikipedia. Don’t hate.

“The Neopagan pentagram is generally displayed with one point up, partly because of the “inverted” goat’s head pentagram’s association with Satanism” (Wikipedia)

So the top two points of the pentagram symbolize the goat’s horns.

As you can see,Oh Sleeper’s logo is the “goat” without horns. Think on that for a minute.

 Source

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